Monday, August 31, 2009

Top 10 reasons you know you have August Ass

August is drawing to a close. My top 10 reasons you know you have August Ass (some of them re-printed from a blog I wrote years back):

10. You wake up every morning thinking that maybe possibly you are at home in your own bed. You then realize that you are in the 122nd hotel room of the season, inducing an attempt at smothering yourself with a pillow.

9. You frown and grimace with each bite of another sandwich from the spread table. With nothing else to eat, you still finish it, have a second, and then look pissed off for no apparent reason.

8. You go to the field and hide every object within the visual spectrum, blunt or sharp, to avoid harming yourself or others.

7. Out of boredom, you find yourself dipping or chewing during games even though you don't dip or chew.

6. You blame everything on a single teammate (every team has a team scapegoat). When this gets old, you blame everything on the trainer, which is never good since he's had a case of the Overworked Ass since February.

5. You had an off-day and wanted to do nothing but sit by yourself with your headphones on.

4. You're tired of sitting in a hotel room so you decide to go to the field early. Upon reaching the field, you find that you're tired of baseball stadiums, and wish you were back in the hotel room.

3. You start howling at the moon for no apparent reason, even during the day, even in public places. You wish the moon would howl back just so you would have someone else to talk to.

2. While walking to lunch, you yell at a random person, "Who's crazy?!" and then just keep on walking.

1. You've already made plans for the first week after the season ends, and think of these plans while banging your head against a wall and crushing another pack of sunflower seeds.


Anonymous said...

Es verwundert wirklich. cialis rezeptfrei apotheke levitra online [url=http//]cialis rezeptfrei[/url]

Anonymous said...

[... ] is one must read source of information on this topic[...]

Anonymous said...

Hi readers
Do not miss your chance to get a free iPhone 4G. Visit

Qing Cai said...

coach outlet online
air force 1 shoes
oakley sunglasses
cartier bracelet
hermes outlet
louis vuitton outlet
michael kors outlet
michael kors outlet store,
kate spade outlet
tods outlet
babyliss pro
tommy hilfiger outlet
true religion jeans,
kate spade outlet
tiffany and co
canada goose outlet
ray ban sunglasses
cheap uggs,
ed hardy clothing
los angeles clippers jerseys
chanel outlet
chanel outlet
michael kors uk
real madrid jersey
san antonio spurs jerseys
supra shoes
miami heat jersey
lebron shoes
michael kors outlet
mcm handbags

Mie Helal said...

I'm going to highly recommend this web site!

soma taha said...


dong dong23 said...

hollister clothing
nfl jerseys
michael kors handbags
true religion
ray ban eyeglasses
burberry handbags
mlb jerseys
coach outlet online
nike trainers
true religion

rehabgad1 said...

Good write-up. I definitely love this site. Keep it up