Thursday, January 21, 2010

The things you think when you're in an MRI machine

So I underwent my first MRI of my life this morning. Our trainer said that not many ballplayers my age could say that. I don't know if that's a compliment or not.

To make up for lost time, I decided to have not one but two MRIs done at the same time. Due to my own stupidity, I've been ignoring pain in both my back and hip for too long. It was time to get it checked out.

The MRI was much louder than I expected. Here were some thoughts that came to mind while I laid there for an hour and a half without moving:

1. We're being attacked by aliens.

2. I feel like I'm trapped in my mom's old, 25-year-old washing machine (it makes similar noises).

3. If a heavy metal guitarist developed schizophrenia and still decided to rehearse, this is what it would sound like.

4. I hope we don't have a fire. I'd never hear the alarm.

5. Maybe this contraption is like the big golden thing in the movie "Sphere." Whatever dreams I have will become real. Except instead of being haunted by "A Thousand Leagues Under the Sea," I'm haunted by "A Thousand Leagues Under the Big Leagues."

6. Hopefully I don't emerge from this thing acting like Lady Gaga.

7. Am I being turned into an Avatar? I better be allowed to fly on one of those weird dragon animals.

Just a few thoughts. I emerged unscathed and free from alien attack.

5 comments:

Minda said...

Well, you are lucky you've never had to have one before - they're not fun! And at least you're not claustrophobic...right?

wjackalope said...

what's the prognosis? Hopefully all is healthy and you'll be in tip top shape for the season.

gbroshuis said...

Not claustrophobic, thank goodness.

Prognosis: Bulging disc in lower back, slight labral tear in hip. No surgery!

Dfensfan said...

Hope the recovery goes well!
I know MRIs are no fun as I had one last fall ('08) for my knee

-Kenny

grossest said...

Minda from Royals Review turned me on to your blog. Just wanted to say I'm enjoying your writing!

Good luck with the back and hip. My dad has had several MRIs and he IS claustrophobic. Even without that extra trauma, they sound like NO FUN.